This is a most unusual little book, for it goes against the grain in terms of how a veteran explains and remembers his time in the military. Unlike other memoirs, where the good and bad of military service is balanced, Bottger makes it clear from the first that he not only hated military service, he was willing to take almost any step to survive the war including lying and physical subterfuge to remain as much as possible safety behind the front lines. 

All armies seek to make the average person into an individual that will obey orders without a second’s hesitation. The tools are as old as armies themselves, and include rote exercises and drills, demands of physical dexterity, irritations that have no point and even individual humiliation. Bottger paints an excellent picture of his introduction into the military and like millions of others, he hated most of the acts and demands inflicted on him. Additionally, he completely ignores any feelings of duty, comradeship, or pride in his “contribution” to the war effort. He makes no claim to being anti-Nazi, does not rale against the injustice of the war; in fact, he is totally detached from any motivation in life other than total self-centered survival.

Bottger managed to spend a remarkable small amount of time in actual combat but did commit an act of self-sacrifice on one occasion in attempting to rescue a tanker from a burning tank. Despite his dislike of the military, he was proud when he was awarded for that bravery and seems to have attended reunions of his division after the war. At the same time, he does not seem to have given any thought to the individual who went to serve in his stead as he managed to stay in a “safe” space by lying about his injuries.

There are few soldiers who hunger for battle and most accept the role that forces them to be in a position where one kills an enemy. Bottger rejected that role and while some may say that it could even be deemed noble, if placed in a war setting, I for one would not want a man to the left or right of me with the mindset of the author.